I always a free spirit who thinks that if its my life so I have to decide who the best person for me to be with.....and why not. But if I want something or demand something its not find genuine by the so called society or by the people who lives in my surroundings. Be happy what you get,you get beyond your expectation or you get what you don't deserve to be,"WHO ARE YOU TO DECIDE WHAT I DESERVE FOR OR WHAT NOT" genuinely its something very stupid which irritates me. I was a below average student in my carrier not a good scorer nor a good carrierist or say carrier oriented person but that doesn't designed my future that i have to marry with a below average student who has no carriers and at the same time no income,no job and demand......"OH MY GOD SO HUGE THAT NO ONE CAN EFFORT, WHATS YOUR PACKAGE". Now what is this package..........NO PACKAGE AT ALL. And why this huge demand because ladka
The Dowry system is extremely deep-rooted in our Indian culture, that sometimes one feels that there is going to be no way out.
ReplyDeleteEven modern, well-educated families launch saving up money for their daughter's dowry as almost immediately as she is born so what can one expect from the uneducated masses, whose only form of education is tradition?
When demands for dowry are not met, the bride is subject to torment, and a lot even killed. The cause many parents do not want to have daughters is because of the dowry they will have to shell out at her marriage, and the trauma they go through owing to never ending demands from her in-laws.
Dowry is an evil, evil system and all of us, at some level, condone it and even contribute to it.
Time and again the boys’ parents do not demand dowry, but our ethnicity is such that we think we must give something to the in-laws. In such cases, offer as much as you receive.
When we go out of our way for the reason that we are the parents of the girl, we only are cause to this evil.
As festivals like Diwali or Holi, approaches and the parents of the daughter downpour her in-laws with gifts. If gifts are anticipated - our daughter is married into the wrong family. If such giving is self-inflicted, we are creating a mistake.
One can provide a token present to their daughter. If want to give her something more, one may do so, but do not feel pressure to furnish anything more than one accept to her in-laws. We don't need to if our daughter is happily married and has a supportive husband.
Surprising quantity of parents still do not lay sufficient emphasis on educating their daughters for they believe that their daughters will get married sooner or later, and husbands will support them, so why thrust them so hard?
Not so rich sections of society would rather propel their daughters out to work and bring in some money, to facilitate them save up for her dowry. Persons from regular middle and upper class backgrounds do send their daughters to school, but don't give emphasis to career options. They view education as a ritual of course. If their daughters do well, it's something to show off
Likewise, extremely wealthy parents will cheerfully maintain their daughters until they get married since the family status and their capability to diverge out a high dowry, they identify they will get good match for their daughter, and don't take their daughters education very sincerely.
One must get serious about daughter's education; push her to have a career of her own, no matter what financial standing. A times the reason parents of the boy ask over for dowry, is that they habitually anticipate that their son will be earning and supporting the wife, and it is only fair that she add somewhat towards the household by way of dowry.
If daughters are educated and have as good a career as their husband to be, then one get a strong step in their support.
As an alternative of giving her dowry just because everyone is nice to her at her new home, one must give her a great career, so if they can't help but respect her.
If they treat her badly, she can walk out, as she is not dependent on them, so they could do with her monthly contribution to the household expenses and dare not mess with her.
Providing one’s daughter with a solid education, plus encouraging her to pursue a career of her choice is the best dowry any parent can ever give to their daughter.
... Sanju